Couple Spotlight: It’s like magic

Today we’re featuring Hanihe and Greg. They are dear friends of mine and (I might be biased) but they might be one of my favorite couples in the history of man. The only couple that could maybe compete is Topanga and Corey. Maybe.

They’ve been together for 6.5 years, married for 1.5, and I’m pretty sure they’ve known each other since pre-puberty. There is something seriously magical about them, and I hope you can learn something from what they share.

When did you know this person was The One?
Hanihe: I don’t know if there was a moment where I knew he was “The One,” but I remember the moment that I thought ‘I could totally marry him.’ We weren’t doing anything special. We were just in the car driving, and I think I started crying because it was pretty terrifying for me. The thought just entered my mind and never left.
Greg: I’m not sure I had a singular moment either. We knew each other first as friends before we started dating, so I knew a good amount about who she was. When our relationship shifted gears into dating, I really began to see all of our deeper connection points and how she was the complete compliment to my personality. I could never be without her humor, caring, or Hanihe-isms.

What is the most brag-worthy quality in your spouse?
Hanihe: That’s a softball. He is so very smart. When we play trivia, everyone wants to be on Greg’s team.
Greg: She’s driven in a way that I envy. In all of her college classes, an A was/is the only option. The fact that she is better at Call of Duty than a lot of guys I know places as a close 2nd.

What is your proudest accomplishment as a team?
Hanihe: You know, I don’t really know. I feel like we have some big accomplishments coming up. Hopefully in the next few years, we’ll have a kid (or 2!), pay off our cars and school loans.
Greg: Agreed. Our best is ahead of us.
Marie’s Note: Do you know how pretty their kids are going to be? Gah. 

What is the biggest hurdle you’ve overcome as a team?
Hanihe: To be honest, me. I wasn’t in a great relationship before I met Greg. I was captain of self-sabotage and didn’t really trust anyone. I tried really hard to push him away. The first major push I made, he called me on it. He said, “I know what you’re trying to do, and it’s not going to work.” Pretty observant for a guy who has only had one other girlfriend (in the 8th grade!)
Greg: Thus far, I think our biggest hurdle was making a long-distance relationship work while we were in college. It was only an hour separation, but it still took effort on both of our parts to see it through.

What was the best year of your relationship? Why?
Hanihe: Since we’ve been married. Living together and calling him my husband has been really great. I was pretty scared of marriage growing up because I come from a pretty dysfunctional family, but he showed me how great it can be to have a permanent teammate. I lost any remnants of crazy I had left.
Greg: I would say the last year has been the best. We’re constantly talking about our plans for the next few years, and it’s deeply gratifying to be building a home and life with her.
Marie’s Note: This part of their relationship is so evident. These two have each other’s back and it’s what I think makes their marriage magical. 

What was the hardest year of your relationship? Why?
2008. Hanihe went to Spain for a month, and Greg was working a lot of hours. We split for a while, and we were both pretty miserable. I think in the end, it showed us how much we meant to each other.

What is one thing a couple can start doing today to change their relationship?
I think we try our best to avoid causing resentment against each other. If we have a problem, we try to talk about it and make sure we know how the other feels. Things left unaddressed only fester. It’s just little things here and there, but we
make sure that each of us gets enough rest or down time to do the things they like.

What tips/advice do you have for couples going through a hard time (either with each other or just life in general)?
Hanihe: Remember that you are each other’s backup. Sure, we all have family and friends that we can rely on, but this is the person you’ve chosen as your partner in life. Don’t take the stresses of life out on each other; help each other through them. I think I’m at my best when Greg’s at his worst because I want to be his support.
Greg: Don’t save something to use as ammunition in an argument later. It’s petty. You’re better than that.
Marie’s Note: Yes, you are.