Nashville Marriage Studio

In the last post I suggested letting your man know you enjoyed his moves, and I ended with a warning not to fake an orgasm.

I would like to repeat myself.

Do NOT fake orgasms.

Yes, he needs to hear your moans and feel your body to respond to his touch.  He does not, however, need to be lied to, especially within the context of one of the most intimate times in a couple’s relationship.  And here’s why:

Um, you aren’t getting what you want when you fake it

I once made out with a guy and made the mistake of randomly expressing pleasure when he touched my hip.  I don’t know why I did it to begin with, but I know that every time we made out from then on his “go to” move was squeezing my hip.  Not exactly pleasurable, but I kept up the charade for a while because I felt bad for “misrepresenting” myself. 

So I got months of hip massages because I faked pleasure.  All faking an orgasm does is reward bad behavior.  Don’t do it!  Instead, move his hands to where you want them and suggest something that sounds fun to you.  Once he starts doing something you like then start moaning.

Fake orgasms destroy intimacy.

A solid, committed relationship is built on intimacy.  Not physical intimacy, necessarily, but that closeness that comes with knowing you can be your complete and uncensored self with another person.  When you pause and look at how often we have to put up fronts with the people in our world you will realize what a true gift it is to have this partnership where you can let your guard down.  Physical intimacy should be a celebration of the closeness and vulnerability that exists in your relationship.  Faking an orgasm destroys that intimacy because it is, essentially, hiding a part of yourself from this person. 

Lying in the bedroom helps no one.